When I walked into the chapel this morning and several sisters were already in their seats, I was certain that Mother Mary Ann had already chosen one of them to light the candles in the advent wreath. I admit that I was a little disappointed.
So you can imagine my surprise when she walked up to me and handed me the lighter!
I was filled with a childlike joy that I would get to light the candles for the second Sunday in a row!
After the traditional prayers and the candles were lit, I returned to my seat and began to ask the question, "Why? Why was I so excited to light all three candles? ".
As I gazed at the three flickering flames I recalled the first Sunday of Advent when I began reading daily reflections in A Child in Winter by Caryll Houselander with commentary by Thomas Hoffman. I was invited to walk with Mary and “grow pregnant with God together” and “to grow large with the abundance of God’s favor”.
In my prayer I have been imagining Christ growing in me and all that goes along with expecting a child. I trust that He is growing in me even though I don’t feel Him moving yet.
What will it feel like when I recognize His stirrings? What will He look like in my life? What will His personality be?
I take more times to rest and allow myself to be with Him in silence and prayer as He grows in me.
At times I get impatient; I want to see Him now! But no, I need to “wait patiently on his own timing of His growth” in me. I don’t want Him to come prematurely.
So, as I look at the three candles that are lit in the advent wreath I realize I am excited because I feel like I am looking at a pregnancy ticker that counts down the days until the due date.
The time of His arrival is coming and soon it will be here!
Rejoice! Rejoice, Believers!
_ Sr. Sophia Grace Huschka, TOR
